It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
