We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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