ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
