How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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