Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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