So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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