She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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