i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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