I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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