google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
