am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
