Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Me. At least after what I've been through.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
BRING THE BAGELS
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
