We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
