Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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