Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Randomize
