I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She announced her abortion via fbk
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize