I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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