Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Randomize
