Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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