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Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
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