You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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