You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
