Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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