They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
