also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Randomize
