So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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