worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
