gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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