how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
