he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
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