My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
