Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Randomize
