"it" just moved
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
sex in a hospital.. check
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
