the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
