But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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