Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
