is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
