grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
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