What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Randomize
