Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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