O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
