i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
