it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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