belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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