rhymes with "ouble enetration"
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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