Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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