We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
