So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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