Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Randomize
