There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
