Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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