My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
